Have you ever stopped to consider how many choices you make every day? Big choices, little choices. Important choices, trivial choices. Choices that only matter for a short time, and choices that you live with for the rest of your life.
One choice I made as a teenager was pulling the chair out from under a classmate who was about to sit down. I guess I thought it would be a clever thing to do, but the hurt I saw on her face bothers me to this day. I continue to pay the consequence for this thoughtless act.
In my work as a judge, I see people
who must answer for the consequences of their acts every day. During my years as a judge, I have come
across remarkably few truly evil people – and for that, I am most
grateful. For the most part, I come
across basically decent people who have done really stupid things.
But even decent people must pay the
consequences for the choices they make. And,
because we are people, we will make bad decisions from time to time. Whether it’s, trashing someone else’s
property, drinking alcohol before one is 21, driving while under the influence… No one is able to lead a perfect life. We all, every one of us, make poor
choices. And we, each one of us, have to
suffer the consequences of our actions.
But, on the other hand, when we
make a mistake, even a horrible mistake, it is not the end of the world. Consequences must be paid, but we can and we
must recover.
The choices we make, we have to
live with them. I have to live with
pulling a chair out from under a schoolmate.
Another has to live with causing the death of his best friend.
The book, The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, has lots of simple
guides to living a more purposeful life.
One of them is “You can’t talk your way out of something you acted your
way into.” You spend years and year
building up your reputation, but one stupid, thoughtless act can bring it
down. You can, and you will say, “I’m
sorry,” But actions do truly speak
louder than words.
My mom used to tell us kids that
“Sorry doesn’t make it better.” And it
really doesn’t. The hurt is still
there. Her favorite vase is still
broken. Only time and effort and acting
as you want to be remembered can make it better.
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Next week: Continuing Education
